Someone tell me why I even keep this blog up?

No one reads this! I hate you guys. Not really, but I need comments. Anything. A dot or dash every once in a while to let me know that you ppl bother. Thanks. Join the Woody Show Fan Forum.

Today's Intern: Tucan Sam

THE WOODY SHOW COMIN AT CANCER BFD PASS: Get your Comin at Cancer BFD pass - brought to you by the xD. Listen to the Woody Show all week to find out how you can support the Lymphoma Research Foundation and snag 2 BFD, Deviant Den, Smoke Out (BBQ) with Cypress Hill @ BFD, Front of Line for Autographs, a Got Wood T-shirt. $250 per pair - Credit Cards will be ran by the Lymphoma Research Foundation not by Live 105.

Normal person, "Do you have some/any scissors?"
St. Louis person/my Japanese father, "Do you have a scissors?"
Woody claims it is retarded. Most of us agree.

Weird things from Woody's weekend:
#1 Beth cut herself badly with a scissors and wound up in the emergency room. Yikes.
#2 Did she get a stitches? No, they glued it. Hooray derma bond!

Emails
*AIS - isn't giving Menace his credit appropriately. They've listed Live 105 as 103.5 and another station under 105.3 (perhaps it's the Mikey Show).
*Gay Marriage topic. My hungry mind wanders in and out.
*Friday Song of the Week - Menace's magical wins... Jackie proposes to Menace an anonymous song submission instead of having names attached to the song. Ah, yes. reppin' the bay.

News & Sports:
>Uh, something about a young girl that has started her period really early. A moronic teacher... I was on the phone with ppl who thought the VIP passes are free. Please note that they ARE NOT free. A 5th grade teacher called in to inform us that 5 girls in her class already started their period and at her school three 2nd graders started as well. Genetically altered food, chemically pumped ingrediants, and parabins/hormones in daily products.
>Cell phone use - pregnant woman who use their cell phone 2/3 times a day increase their risk of a Hpyer active ADD monster child. I wish I could thank my mom, but cell phones weren't invented yet. Or were really expensive.
>Bear Attack story that RULEZ!
>Olympic Try Outs: a least expected contender. Parapalegic wants to run. He has special boingy legs, is that considered a cheat?
>A Woman is sexually violated - oh boy.

>Celtics are moving on.
>Flyers are going home.
>Big Brown continues to rule.
>Eight Belles had no steroids in her system.

In China - a construction truck filled with glue turned over, spilled on the road. Fire fighter attempted to dilute the glue but the solution was so sticky that brooms, tools, and ppl slid and stuck into the glue and were caught for quite a while until they were freed. By the hand of God.

Dumb Ass Contest (1 winner)
Read my mind! (Tony's Mind - Kevin Spacey Movie) Superman Returns!
Winner won: Woody Show Care Package

Well, that's just not right
A DJ in Philly - Kidd Chris, worshipper of Howard Stern, got fired for running a song called 'Shwoogies' by Lady Gash to the tune of Blondie's 'Call Me' based on racial grounds. Wow, so "shwoogies" is a racist term for Black people, commonly used on the East Coast. Apparently he's been playing it since mid-March. Who does this?

Music & Entertainment:
>Prince Caspian had a great weekend: Dominated Box office
>Coldplay was not speaking for a while... Chris Martin says the members of the band weren't really speaking until they stepped into the studio to re-record after 2 years of promoting
>Offspring to reissue 2 earlier albums: 1992's Ignition and 1994's Smash. These are coming out with the new album, Rise and Fall, Rage and Grace on June 17 of this year.
>Death Cab for Cutie - I typed them into Google followed by "news" and this is what came up... I make my own reports at times.
>Mike Tyson documentary... what?

Douche bag of the day
5'3" construction worker beat his live-in gf. she made him dinner when he wasn't hungry. 42 year old left and continued to drink and go out to eat fried chicken with his friends. When he returned to his home near Disneyland he proceeded rape and molest his GF's mute daughter. He was fortunately caught red handed by the girl's uncle. He won 10 years in a California state prison. Apparently he has a family in Mexico and other counts of this behavior on his record south of the border.

Uh. New Kids on the Block. Yup, the rise and fall of boy bands, mands. Bleh.

Crap on Celebrities
>Ashlee Simpson is 4 months pregnangt and married.
>Bouncy (aka Beyonce) might be pregnant. Whatever. She sucks.
>Britney Spears is vacationing with Mel Gibson. Whaaa~?

Celebritiy Birthdays
Uh, bunch of nobodies. But hey! Sarah, Woody Show webcam mistress, turns 5 today! You go girl. Seriously though she is 19! Celebrate ^_^

Grade Today's Show: 58% A

Today's Just the Headline: "*clap*"