Tuesday, June 24, 2008

This is why you wake up.

Who kicks us off?? Yeah, this guy. Mr. Zombie.

Today's Intern:
Sara-on-pain-meds cuz someone stole her wisdom toofs.

New & Improved!! Why messing around with successful products to improve them only ruins them.
Menace goes back to school for programs at the station, but the version he's learning is not what Live105 has. And they are resisting with purchasing the version he's learning. WTF?

Don't forget to play Black or old!! When you approach any Chrysler 300 guess with other passengers in the vehicle with you if the driver is a Black person or an old person?

Old people drivers: 82 year old woman ran through a security fence onto a runway at an airport.

Emails!
>WTR you are all ugly idiots.
>Phantom Pooper theory - is it the employees at the hotels where Menace cacas?
>WTF - What the heck is this 1% tax charge for universal health care? I wish I could smack someone once a day. ME TOO!!! We should start smacking people together. The idiot smack crusade! I don't have health.
>Bitches are crazy. Check it out - new hot front desk chick, they flirted, he got her number, she avoided a real date, he starts dating someone else, and she corners him and tell him she's hurt that he's seeing someone other than her. Chicks are nuts.
More side notes - Bush's 'Swallowed' and Erykah Badu's 'Honey' are STUCK stuck stuck in my head this morning. Sharing is Caring.

Woody brings up how tapeworms would be a great weight loss program. We learn that it was a fad at the turn of the century up until the 20's. Also that tapeworms when they are done being a parasite in one's body, will leave the FASTEST WAY possible, even if that's your MOUTH. Ugh. I've always wanted a tape worm, too, just a coopertive one not an evil gross annoying one. I guess eat undercooked 3 world beef. Avoid the 3 world pork...

News & Sports:
>Bay Area Fires - getting help from surrounding firefighters!
>Just because it's funny doesn't mean it's not real - folks in San Francisco are voting to name a sewage system after President George W Bush.
>Dissatisfied customer goes head to head with a cook. Placing foreign objects inside a STEAK, the surprise inside - PUBES. Yes! (I hate free loaders, even if it's my nickname.)
>Imus vs Adam Pacman Jones? What. Racism results in "Oposite Day on the Imus Show." Al Sharpton jumps on this story.

>Kobe and Shaq and something someone in BEIJING. Cue ching-chong music. [I say it because I'm AZN.]
>Shaq does a freestyle clown on Kobe, asking Mr. Bryant how Shaq's booty tastes?
>Adam "Pacman" Jones would like to be taken more seriously and is dropping the Pacman now that he's a Dallas Cowboy. Who knew? I do.

Ravey's Non Sequitors Clip - Hilarious, mostly last week's potty humor.

DumbAss Contest (1 winner)
The impossible trivia: 1 in 6 women own more than 50 of these! Purses.
Winner won: STP Tickets

Music & Entertainment:
>Motley Crue new album, Shine Down, G Love and Special Sauce
>10,000 BC is out on DVD.
>Futurama Movie: Beast with a Billion Backs (?)
>Smashing Pumpkins recording and prepping for a tour. Gish?? Dish? Bish??
>Beck's trailer for his new album coming out soon. 7/8
>Sopranos coming out in a 30 disc pack that weighs 10 lb + 16 deleted scenes. YES!! I LOVE SOPRANOS.
>Wipe out and How I survived a Japanese Game Show premier this week!
>Celebrity Family Feud. Really? Ice-T & Coco
>Hell's Kitchen - Great show. I love to watch you cook. [fap fap]

Guess the State
(1 winner)
Wisconsin!! (Pardeeville)
Story: Cokehead drug dealer sold coke, pot, and dicepham/valium to an undercover cop. When the cops went to pull her over, they couldn't find her coke stash anywhere. Chivan "crotched the blow" - was about the size of a golf ball.
Winner won: Nascar 09 for the Ps2

Stewpid Lawsuits?
HMPH.
Victoria's Secret - Thong Suit [Cue Cisco's Thong Song] A design problem on a pumpkin headed meter maid's thong caused a metal piece of the panties to pop off and fly at her face. Her lawyer makes the point that a few inches over and it would have hit her EYE!! Who cares?
Crap on Celebrities:
>Heather Mills SUCKS this story made me Not Like Her. One legged calendar?
>Gossip Blogs are going coocoo that a Comic Superstar is exploring a new persona of an openly gay man...
>Linda Hogan calls 911. The 911 operator berates her for FOLLOWING the stalker that was just at her house. Someone is at her house even though he has been ordered to stay away from her and her house. SO SHE FOLLOWS HIM WHEN HE LEAVES and calls 911. Go kill yourself.
Crappy Birthdays
Missed it. WHO ARE THESE STUPID PEOPLE?? Caller and I rant about how pathetic it is to have ppl like Heidi and Spencer and the Kardashians in our vocabulary! Really. Get out of my life.
Porno Birthdays
456 films! Sydney Cox 38 years old today.
Grade the Show: 61.4% A
Today's Just the Headline: "Pet gerbil blamed for 3 car accident."

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Awesome Blog, yet again! Although now I have Erykah Badu stuck in my head, thanks! *Sarcasm* Haha, that's ok though, I am a fan. Except I have "Bag Lady" and not "Honey" stuck in my head.

Unknown said...

wow funny blog i going to start reading it more!!!!!!!!!!!

Blogoutwithyourlogout said...

just more ramblings of a slighly/moderately retarded hot chick! Haha. Good job, though!

Anonymous said...

Tapeworms rule!! lol!!

Unknown said...

Awesome blog. Hope you finally get more comments!

josefromthe925 said...

Good job with the blog. Its always cool to read it!

al_kaholic said...

Excellent Blah_ggggg, Vuh_mess_ah, keep up the good work, and by that i mean showing to work on time. JK. also keep up the phone(y) screening job, and i know u know, what else u can keep up. -hiccup

al_kaholic said...

Excellent Blah_ggggg, Vuh_mess_ah, keep up the good work, and by that i mean showing to work on time. JK. also keep up the phone(y) screening job, and i know u know, what else u can keep up. -hiccup